So You Want To Be A Writer

Yes, despite the cynicism of this poem, I still certainly DO want to be a writer!

So You Want to Be a Writer
By Charles Bukowski

if it doesn’t come bursting out of you
in spite of everything,
don’t do it.
unless it comes unasked out of your
heart and your mind and your mouth
and your gut,
don’t do it.
if you have to sit for hours
staring at your computer screen
or hunched over your
searching for words,
don’t do it.
if you’re doing it for money or
don’t do it.
if you’re doing it because you want
women in your bed,
don’t do it.
if you have to sit there and
rewrite it again and again,
don’t do it.
if it’s hard work just thinking about doing it,
don’t do it.
if you’re trying to write like somebody
forget about it.
if you have to wait for it to roar out of
then wait patiently.
if it never does roar out of you,
do something else.

if you first have to read it to your wife
or your girlfriend or your boyfriend
or your parents or to anybody at all,
you’re not ready.

don’t be like so many writers,
don’t be like so many thousands of
people who call themselves writers,
don’t be dull and boring and
pretentious, don’t be consumed with self-
the libraries of the world have
yawned themselves to
over your kind.
don’t add to that.
don’t do it.
unless it comes out of
your soul like a rocket,
unless being still would
drive you to madness or
suicide or murder,
don’t do it.
unless the sun inside you is
burning your gut,
don’t do it.

when it is truly time,
and if you have been chosen,
it will do it by
itself and it will keep on doing it
until you die or it dies in you.

there is no other way.

and there never was.

Thanksgiving Is The New Black Friday

It seems that more and more stores are opening their doors to shoppers on Thanksgiving instead of waiting until what was once the traditional “Black Friday”.  For my state of Massachusetts, this doesn’t apply.   Stores cannot open on Thanksgiving, thanks to the existing “Blue Laws”.

For years there has been a great deal of bellyaching from consumers regarding stores that are open on Thanksgiving.  I can see their point.  After all, Thanksgiving is a holiday meant to be spent with the family, not shopping or even worse–working.  For the employees who feel they are being wronged for having to work on turkey day, consider these points:

1.  If you were an emergency room nurse or doctor you probably would be working.

2.  If you were a chef, waitress or restaurant owner you probably would be working.

3.  You will be earning extra money.

4.  Thanksgiving is a day where we have a meal.  We do that every day.  It’s just a bigger meal but it shouldn’t be an all day food-fest.  If it is, you are missing the meaning behind Thanksgiving.

5.  You can still have your Thanksgiving dinner when you are done working.

6.  Just think of all the family bickering you get to miss!

7.  The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade has become quite lame.  You won’t be missing anything.

8.  Working on Thanksgiving may not be as bad as working on Black Friday.  Sure the stores have Thanksgiving Day sales, but they usually are not as lucrative sales as the ones on Black Friday.

9.  Just think of all the calories you’ll save in not being able to eat as much.  Plus you’ll burn some calories as you work.

10.  When you took a job in retail, this is something you should have thought about.

As a veteran Black Friday shopper I’m trying something new this year.  Luckily I live near the Connecticut border.  Since I have to head that way to pick up one of my relatives for dinner, I’m going to stop in at KMart for their Thanksgiving Day sale.  Then later on that day when I bring my relative home, I’m planning on hitting the 24-hour Walmart for their sale that starts at 6:00 p.m.  Assuming I can get all I need to get in Connecticut, this can free me up to go home, have another piece of pie, rest a bit and gear up for the Holyoke Mall at midnight.

The beauty of stores opening earlier and earlier is that I get done shopping earlier.  Instead of spending my entire Friday out and about shopping like I used to in the past, I’ll be home by late morning and I’ll have the rest of the day to do what I want.  Works for me!


The Airwaves Are Starting To Sound Like Christmas!

I really thought this past week would be the week for Christmas music to hit the local airwaves.

Monday:  nothing.  Tuesday:  nothing.  Wednesday:  nothing.  Thursday:  nothing:

Then…Friday morning.  Still nothing.  I checked WSRS at noon.  Still nothing.  Then at 3:00 something wonderful happened.  WSRS FINALLY got the hint and went ALL CHRISTMAS!  What the hell took so long?

I have a feeling a great deal of others are going to follow suit this coming week.

I sure miss the WODS days when they would’ve been playing Christmas music for two weeks by now!

Break THIS!

Oh my.  Kim Kardashian bared it all on the front of a magazine.  Why is everyone surprised?  After all this is the same classless twit who made a sex tape in 2007 which leaked to the public.  So what’s the difference?

I’d say the biggest difference now is that she is a mother.  Unfortunately, considering who the child’s family is, this kid is probably going to grow up, learn about these trashy events and say “that’s my Mom.  I’m so proud”.

The truth is this bitch wouldn’t know real life if it came up and slapped her on her tan, glossy ass.  If she was ever given a dose of what real life is like she’d run and hide because she wouldn’t be able to handle it.  She doesn’t know, and will never know, what true love really is.  She doesn’t know what it’s really like to work.  And it’s clearly obvious she doesn’t have a clue how to be a mother.

But I laugh to myself when I think about this:  considering all the money she has, I probably still have a better credit score than she does!


Being An Illegal American

One thing I’m tired of hearing people complain about is “illegal” citizens living in the United States.

Well, guess what, people?  Unless your direct descendants were Native Americans, we are ALL “illegal”!  Our ancestors hopped on a boat almost 400 years ago, leaving their home land because things weren’t going so well between them and the King.  They landed on a rock in what is now called Plymouth, Massachusetts.  And then they met the people who already lived here:  the Indians–the Pokanokets and Wampanoags, among others.  Yup.  These foreigners from England “illegally” stepped foot on the land where these Indians had been residing for eons and BOOM!  Yes they had come here for a better way of life.  But soon these illegal immigrants decided to start taking things over.  They even took it upon themselves to bring smallpox and other fatal diseases with them to the new land and pass them around to the innocent, original residents.  How nice of these illegal immigrants called the Pilgrims.  They managed to single-handedly kill off a great deal of the native population.

Considering all the things the illegal white man did to the Native Americans and their country, many were trustworthy individuals and let the white man stay.  Sure there were incidents.  But the Indians didn’t sic their government on these new settlers.  Instead the white man created a government which eventually dictated where the Indians would live.  How is that for some turned tables?

So the next time you start complaining about “illegals” in this country, just remember where you more than likely originated from.  You illegal American, you!


Look Beyond The Tits, Guys…She’s a Pedophile!

It is so like the typical male to comment so positively about Molly Shattuck (more like “shack up”), the 47-year-old divorced twit and mother of three who gained notoriety when she became the oldest cheerleader in the NFL.  Now she’s gaining attention for something else.  Being a pedophile.

Ms. “shack up” raped and provided alcohol to a 15-year-old boy.  She’s been charged with two counts of third degree rape, four counts of unlawful sexual contact and three counts of providing alcohol to minors.  Those aren’t minor charges.  Bet those who are thinking so positively about her don’t realize she also will need to register as a sex offender now.

And here are some of the comments I’ve read about it (all from men, of course):

The kid should get the key to the city and a Ravens jersey with his own number.

That is not rape….boys and girls are just different. All of his buddies say “score”! But it is kinda creepy. (well, at least you agree it’s creepy!)

I’m just trying to turn a neg in to a pos

Really?  I don’t see ANYTHING positive about this story!

I wonder how these men would feel if some 47-year-old former football player was boinking their 15-year-old daughter and giving her booze.

Once Ms. “shack up” gets her shit together, she really  needs to re-evaluate her life.  I understand being a horny divorcee’ is tough, but does it make one so desperate that they have to go after children?  When you have three children of your very own?  She’s so pathetic she can’t even find someone her own age who wants to fuck her!

You know what I think is really comical about this twit?  She allegedly wrote a book called “Vibrant Life”, a write-up about how to live a healthy lifestyle. Maybe while she’s in the clink she can write another one called “My Pedophile Life”.



Veterans Like Christmas Music Too

There seems to be a little uproar over Christmas music being played before Veteran’s Day/Remembrance Day.  As one veteran friend of mine said, “What’s the big deal?  Veterans like Christmas music too!”.

Apparently some feel playing Christmas music before these holidays is “disrespectful” to veterans.  I’m not sure how hearing “Silent Night” or “Deck The Halls” is disrespecting anyone currently in or formerly of the military.  Does anyone remember the Christmas Truce of 1914 where, if only briefly, both sides stopped fighting to celebrate Christmas?  I don’t think any of them felt it was disrespectful!

I think for the complainers it’s just their way of holding off playing Christmas music until the very last moment.  If these people had their way, they wouldn’t play Christmas music until, well, CHRISTMAS!

Well, for anyone who agrees to not play Christmas music (or put up decorations) until after Veteran’s Day/Remembrance Day, you only have until next Tuesday to keep bitching.

Then it’s CHRISTMAS ALL THE WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Would you want someone to talk to your mother like that?

An ad agency recently had the brilliant idea of having a female walk the streets of New York to see how many times she got cat-called by male onlookers.  They even taped it to make it go viral.

Some say the guys were “planted”; maybe they were.  In my opinion I don’t think the woman was anything worth hollering at.  So that makes me wonder: if these guys weren’t planted, maybe they’ll yell at just about anything!

But going beyond looks, the point is these men still hollered stuff at this woman, from a simple “hey baby” to “sexy American Eagle” (commenting on the brand of jeans she was wearing).  In watching the video it’s true that these guys certainly could have said and did a hell of a lot worse.

What men need to think about before cat-calling to any woman on the street is how they would feel if they knew someone was cat-calling to their mother, or their wife, girlfriend, sister or daughter?  Or worse–harassing them, either verbally or physically.  Then again, maybe many of them wouldn’t care because they don’t care about the women in their lives.

For most women, if they are walking down the street, they are going somewhere or they have things to do.  They’re not looking to get hit on.  If they wanted that, they’d go to a bar.  There’s a time and a place for flirting and the sidewalks of New York, at any time, is not the answer.

It’s that time of year again (part two)

Okay, here is my Christmas post.

Haven’t heard any Christmas music on the radio–yet.  But I know one station is close.  Providence’s 105.1 has begun streaming commercial-free Christmas music so I think it’s only a matter of time.

Speaking of time:  only 25 more days until BLACK FRIDAY!  Or in a lot of states (mine is not one of them!  Thanks, Massachusetts!) – BLACK THURSDAY.  Which also means Thanksgiving is 24 days away.

Speaking of more time:  I’m still waiting to see how much more I can get done with that extra hour we supposedly gained over the weekend….

It’s that time of year again!

Did you think I was going to start talking about Christmas?  No, that will be in my next post.  What I’m talking about here is:  time to have your voices heard, America!

Tomorrow get out and vote.  Answer those questions.  Select that governor and that representative.  You may think it doesn’t matter, but it really does.