Dear Oh Most Irritating Hacker:
Do you have fucking emphysema or what? Have you seen a goddamn doctor for that phlegm hack I have to listen to every fucking day? I sure hope whatever you have is not catchy, although I have a feeling nobody will catch it because your annoyance is more likely from those lovely cancer sticks you smoke everyday. Yeah, keep on puffin’, bitch.
Cougher, do us all a fucking favor and see a doctor. PRONTO. For not only your own health but the fucking sanity of those around you!