Although not a “true” Christmas episode, I chose this episode because it’s the second to last before Diane leaves. I know I could have chosen the Christmas episode from Season 6, but I like Diane better than Rebecca. Plus, this episode does have a very important Christmas theme.

Sam and Diane are on the verge of getting married. Diane rushes into the bar and announces to Sam that she has found a house. As she’s rambling on about what’s in the house, Sam interrupts her and reminds her they agreed to live in his apartment the first year. Diane asks Sam to come look at the house. Sam says he isn’t ready to own a home, and he has to work up to it.

Norm pipes in: “Sammy’s right. It’s a big responsibility. You got lawns to mow, you got plumbing to fix, you got gutters to clean and every couple of years, you got to paint the entire thing from top to bottom. Honestly, I don’t know where Vera gets the energy”.

Diane continues to try to convince Sam and then tells him that they own it because she put a deposit on it.

So, Diane convinces Sam to buy the house and the first thing Sam moves in is his prized possession picture of dogs playing blackjack. Sam places it on the mantel and admires it, laughing as Diane looks on in disgust. Just as Diane and Sam start to get amorous, an elderly couple appears carrying some boxes. They are the previous owners, Bert and Lillian Miller. They had forgotten a few odds and ends and were taking a last look at the house.

Bert: When you’ve lived in a house for forty years, taking that last step out the doorway, it’s pretty hard.

Lillian: But you look like a fine couple. I’m glad the house is going to you.

Bert and Lillian go on reminiscing about memories they’ve experienced in the house, such as their kid Mikey climbing up the bookshelf and hitting his head on the mantle, their daughter Janie rehearsing her dance for the school play and the spot where Bertie Jr. took his first steps and the spot where the Christmas tree went every year.

Bert: Forty Christmases.

Lillian: Thirty-nine. Well, we didn’t quite make it to Christmas this year.

Bert: I think we’ll miss the Christmases most of all.

As they’re talking you can see Diane listening to them and Sam is just paying attention to his picture.

Bert and Lillian leave, saying they are headed to the bus stop. As they leave you can see the despair on Diane’s face. As Sam lays down on the floor, insisting Diane join him, Diane opens the door and cries, “I cannot live a single day in this house” and runs out the door.

In the next scene, Sam and Diane enter the house again, and it seems Sam has consoled Diane and indicates he has taken his picture down, which Diane appreciates. But Diane insists the place belongs to Bert and Lillian.

Sam tries to make Diane feel better by showing her what they can do to the house. They can knock out a wall and then Diane notices the heights of the children written on the wall.

Diane: Can’t you see this is a record of their lives?

Sam: All I can see here is that little Janie was a moose.

Next all their friends from the bar come in with housewarming gifts. Diane tells them all to leave and that she’ll never live in the house.

Sam tells Diane that all houses have their own ghosts, their own memories and the only way to get over that is to create your own memories. Diane agrees and says she was overreacting. Although when Sam suggests they finish their conversation naked, Diane tells him she could never make love in that house.

So, they try selling the house to another couple. But Diane changes her mind because the couple was “bereft of soul”.

Diane explains she just can’t live there, especially depriving that cute old couple their last Christmas in the house.

Then Frasier suggests they give them one last Christmas. Sam thinks it’s a screwy idea, but Diane loves it. She suggests they throw them a Christmas party. Not at Christmas. Now.

They give Bert and Lillian and all their kids and grandkids one last Christmas in the house. Complete with a decorated tree and Sam dressed as Santa. Of course, it’s springtime so it’s eighty degrees outside and there’s a fire going in the fireplace. And Santa’s feeling kind of warm.

Once Diane gets the family singing carols, Sam pulls Diane aside and says “We did it, they’re singing their carols, we passed out the presents, now can we put out the stupid fire and get the Millers out of here, please?”

Diane: Oh, but Sam, we haven’t roasted the chestnuts.

Sam: Guess again, sweetie.

When Bert announces that this will be the last Christmas for them in the house, the kids start asking about Easter. Then Diane suggests they make getting together for holidays an annual event. But Sam puts his foot down and tells them no and indicates it’s time for everyone to leave.

As the kids complain, Lillian reminds them that Santa is right, although a bit rude, but it is true. They have been imposing. They all leave singing “Frosty the Snowman” and head over to Bert and Lillian’s new condo.

Diane is impressed that Sam “claimed” the house for her by kicking everyone out and the two set off to finally start making their mark in the house. Starting in the dining room. But first the dog painting needs to be removed from the room.

FUN FACT: Bert and Lillian Miller were played by Billie Bird and Douglas Seale, both who “hooked up” at the end of the Christmas film “Ernest Saves Christmas”.

The posting of this episode is in honor of George Wendt who played Norm on the show and sadly passed away in May of this year.