Posted in writing

Old Musicians Never Die….

A musical #FlashbackFriday. Taking us back to 2015…

This past week I was faced with a tough task:  I had to comfort a 13-year-old girl I mentor over Zayn Malik’s recent departure from the boy band One Direction.

Here’s how the conversation kind of went:

13-year-old heartbroken girl:  Why would Zayn leave the group?  (choking on a sob)  How could he do this?

Me:  Honey, I know you’re upset.  These things happen all the time.  Look at the Beatles.

13-year-old heartbroken girl:  Who are the Beatles?

After that I held my tongue.  Although I really wanted to give this kid a dose of reality, I couldn’t do that to her.  However, if I could’ve mustered up the courage to lay the truth down to her, here is what I probably would have said:

When four or five guys (or girls) form a band and that band becomes fairly successful, something called EGO takes over.  And when four or five EGOS are fighting for this or that, all hell can break loose.  Shit happens.  Such as:

A woman comes between two members of the band and wham!  Not only is the group done but so is a friendship.

A band member becomes physically hurt in an accident.  To numb the pain he is turned on to heroin by a “friend”.  As his addiction increases, the other members intervene.  He is eventually kicked out of the band.  The band covers it up saying that this band member who has left is “pursuing other musical interests” but interestingly enough, this band member does nothing musically for years.  The remaining members eventually disband and the drug addict member does recover and eventually does make a musical come back.

A band member is murdered by another band member.

A member of the band leaves because she wants to settle down and have a family.

A member of the band turns 16.

The band gets OLD.  Nobody buys their music any longer.  Who cares?

I could go on and on.  Over the years there have been countless band demises for numerous reasons.  Most of us don’t stay in the same job with the same company all of our lives.  Why would we expect the same of any musician?

Seeing your favorite band perform when you are 13 is a lot different from seeing that same band perform when you are 30.  You’ve all grown up.  And most musicians don’t age well.   They have developed certain ailments:  arthritis, diabetes, hearing loss, vision loss, memory loss.  Try to enjoy a performance from a musical act whose guitarist is struggling to play the guitar due to arthritis, the drummer keeps hitting the cymbal in the wrong spot because his depth perception is off, the bassist is wishing he could escape to the bathroom, the keyboardist is playing the wrong notes because he can’t hear well and the lead singer is trying to remember what the hell city he’s in.  That’s when it’s time to hang it up.

Sure it would be nice if our favorite bands could last forever.  But would we still want to see them when we’re in our sixties and they’re in their eighties (if they are even still alive?).  Not every band is the Rolling Stones…

So to my 13-year-old friend I say:  you have the memories of when Zayn was in the band.  If you really care about him as a fan, be glad for him that he is finally able to do what he really wants to do, whatever that may be.  Maybe you’ll catch him on the One Direction Reunion Tour thirty years from now….he’ll be the one with the cane.

OLDMUSICIANS

 

Posted in writing

BUCKLE UP!

It’s been an interesting 24 hours.

We’ve started an impeachment inquiry.

We’ve read a memo between two people who consider themselves “leaders” of certain countries, but in some instances, (mainly when SHITHOLE is speaking), they sound like five-year-olds.

We’ve reached 218 in the House.

Whistleblower complaint is in the hands of Congress and is making for great reading material this evening.  They’ve unanimously voted to let us see it too.  I’m hearing it’s a real doozy.  For SHITHOLE.

There is a very good chance WB will meet with Congress.  Allegedly DNI is meeting with them tomorrow.

By now the world knows that basically this memo was a “scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours” type of thing.  Which really isn’t legal.  Especially when you’re talking money for dirt on a possible political opponent. (I find it hysterical that SHITHOLE is so weak that he needs to try this early to sabotage someone who he may not even be running against.  That solidifies how stupid SHITHOLE is.)

In reviewing this memo, there’s a few things I wanted to point out and comment on:

In the 7th paragraph in the memo where SHITHOLE speaks and says:

I would like you to do us a favor though because our country has been through a lot and Ukraine knows a lot about it

So SHITHOLE is asking for a favor.  He feels his country has been through a lot and Ukraine knows a lot about it.

Yes, SHITHOLE, I feel that in the past two-and-a-half years America has been through a lot.  BECAUSE OF YOU!  You have banned Muslims, caged children, tried to take away our healthcare, fucked with our taxes, repealed laws that were put in place to make our lives better and declared an emergency for a wall that only you want built.  These things, among others, should be cause for your impeachment alone.

Now I can’t speak for Ukraine and considering their own shitty “president” (a fucking former comedian), I’m not really sure how much they really know about what America has experienced with you being “in charge”.

Of the 18 paragraphs, five of them mention Rudy and Bill.  Especially Rudy.  It’s almost like SHITHOLE had to keep reminding himself to have Rudy and Bill call Zelensky.  Why not just write it down?

Zelensky does mention coming to NYC and staying at SHITHOLE’S tower. Maybe he could have his meeting with Rudy and Bill there.  God knows many other suspicious meetings have taken place there.  Perfect place for it.

Neither of them like women.  Or at least the former female Ambassador to Ukraine.

Not that he cares, but Mueller should note that once again SHITHOLE throws him under the bus.  Merkel should note (and probably already knows) these assholes are terrified of her.

Then there’s the 9th paragraph:

The other thing, There’s a lot of talk about Biden’s son, that Biden stopped the prosecution and a lot of people want to find out about that so whatever you can do with the Attorney General would be great. Biden went around bragging that he stopped the prosecution so if you can look into it… It sounds horrible to me.

A lot of people want to find out about that.  Who exactly are “a lot of people”?  More than likely SHITHOLE and himself.  And maybe Rudy and Bill.  The majority of the world, and America in general, could care less.

It sounds horrible to me.  SHITHOLE, anything you say sounds horrible to the world.  You are a horrible person.  You really.  Truly.  Are.

The next several months and leading into 2020 will be America’s breaking point.  Although I think we’ve already reached that point.  Buckle up.  It’s going to be a very interesting ride.

Posted in writing

Dear Me: A Letter to My 17-Year-Old Self

Dear Me:

You’ve made it this far and so many never thought you would.  Congrats!

The 80’s did you well.  You finished out the decade by graduating from high school and getting your first job.  Good thing you took all those typing and business classes in high school.  They all paid off.

That Springsteen concert you attended was epic.  You know the one.  Tunnel of Love Express Tour, opening night Centrum, eighth row from the stage.  You skipped school to get the wristband and wore it for a week.  That show will remain with you and you will be a Springsteen fan for life.  By the way, he’s now 70 years old.

Speaking of musicians, don’t burn too many brain cells over answers to questions you ask them on call-in radio shows.  Fifteen years after the fact when you actually meet them, it won’t mean a damn thing.  Still, it will be cool.

On work, although you went to broadcasting school, you’ll pay the bills through insurance jobs and some freelance work.  Never give up on your dream of being a teacher, writer or radio personality.

You won’t love many, but the ones you do love will mean the world to you.  You will be devastated when you learn of your first love’s death when he was only 45.  Best of all, you will marry your best friend and you will live to see at least 25 years with him (and finish each other’s sentences on a daily basis).

You will go through eight years of infertility.  Don’t worry.  You will have a daughter who will be the light of your life.  Raising her will be the best and most difficult job you’ll ever have.

Sadly at age 27 you will become an orphan.  Even more sad, your much younger sisters will be orphans at ages 14 and 16.  And lucky you!  They will move in with you for at least the next ten years.  The good news is, they do grow up, get married and have families of their own.  And you love them.

The worst and most hectic six months of your life will occur at age 27, in 1998, when you are ten years older than you are now.  That June you will move into your first house, that August your mother will pass away, that October you will lose your job of nine years and best of all, that damn stray dog at your mother’s house just gave birth to eight puppies and guess where they will all live for the next eight weeks?  In your basement!  Fun times!

You will become a Patriots fan.  Yes, I know at age 17 you could care less about football, much less Patriots football.  But trust me.  They become extremely relevant.  You will love Tom Brady.

Lastly, your health.  No, you’ll never be skinny, although from the years 2003 to 2004 you will lose roughly 80 pounds and look pretty good.  Your early 30’s treat you well.  And although you have a lot of fun and do a lot of traveling to Canada, you do develop high blood pressure (runs in the family), gain a hernia from your C-section and develop diabetes in your mid-40’s.  But you manage it.  You have to.  You have so many to care for.  Especially yourself.

As you near your 50th year you’ll want to do something special.  It’s a big year.  You turn 50, your daughter turns 16 and you’ve been married for 25 years.  That’s something to celebrate.

So, self, get out there and enjoy the rest of your life!

Love,

Me

 

Posted in writing

Why

A part of me regrets it.

A bigger part of me knows what happened had to happen because everything happens for a reason.

Some things I miss. Most things I don’t.

I’m flattered and creeped out at the same time.

This fanship has set sail for better grounds.

Adios.

Posted in writing

Decisions, decisions…we all make them

What we can all learn from disgraced Supreme Court Justice Kavanaugh (or as I like to refer to him: “Cuckanuts”), is that, no matter what you plan to do, don’t be an asshole at any time in your life.  It will come back to bite you in the ass. Plus, nobody likes an asshole.

Think about what repercussions your current decisions may have somewhere down the line.  You decide to drink and drive.  You “jokingly” pull your dick out at a college party and stick it in the hands of a random female.  You choose to have unprotected sex.  You get drunk and rape a fellow classmate.  You choose to ride the roller coaster after you ate pizza.  You adopt a dog or cat although you are severely allergic to them.  You wash your reds with your whites.  You get the shits from eating too many prunes because, hey, you love prunes.  You get the picture.

Of course, some repercussions aren’t as severe as others.  I mean, if you become President of the United States nobody’s going to give a fuck if you puked after riding the roller coaster when you were ten.  But it really means something if you admit on tape that you enjoy grabbing women by the pussy and then become the “President”.

People won’t give a fuck if you become a Supreme Court judge but fucked up washing your clothes while in college and ended up having to wear red underwear to your keg party. But they will be concerned if there are many sexual misconduct allegations brought against you from when you were at that keg party and then you become a Supreme Court judge.

The world won’t give a fuck if you shit your pants during a college football game because you ate too many prunes; because, hey, prunes are good for you.  But two women bring lawsuits against you for rape and you are now a pro athlete and part of the best team in football.  That’s heavy stuff.  Once again, you’ll be wishing all you had to worry about were having the shits.

The world won’t end if you’re a young, starving musician and adopt a dog or cat, even if you’re severely allergic to them.  Then you break out in hives daily.  But have unprotected sex as a rock icon and you could end up with a lifelong issue, be it medical or human.

The world may make it go viral if you are an up and coming star at the office who does bad karaoke at a Christmas party.  But if you are an important CEO who decides to drink at that Christmas party and then drive home, you are putting your life and the lives of many at risk.  Even if you’re just an up and coming star at the office who drinks and drives you’re putting lives at risk.  Just. Don’t. Do. It.

Cuckanuts may be sitting on the Supreme Court for now and that may seem prestigious in his eyes, but really, would you want to be him, knowing what you’ve done to many women, how you acted during your hearing, embarrassing yourself and your entire family and still embarrassing them and yourself every day?  Simply put:  in life, don’t be a Cuckanuts. Just. Don’t. Do. It.